hari ng sablay

after a long jogging kaninang morning sa grand stand<on diet kuno aq eh>.. bkit hari ng sablay ang tile ng blog q tonight??? Well ito ung kanta ngaun dito sa comshop eh.. 

 

hai naku.. im coming back nga.. coming back to all my drama evrytime im opening this page.. tama ba un???

 

the lenten had past ng parang ordinaryong araw lang sakin.. and this is the first time na nangyari un na ala tlga aqng ginawa.. no Visita Iglesia.. no station of the cross.. no fasting<fast eating pa ata ginawa q>ala tlga aqng ginawa kundi magbasa.. hindi ng bible nor pasyong mahal.. kundi  ng mga romantic pocketbooks.. kaya nagiging idealistic aq pagdating sa lovelyf q.. becoz im dreaming of a perfect luvstory na alam q namang never na mangyayari tulad ng nababasa q.. i may say i cud have a perfect luv story kun matatagpuan q na un true luv q.. and for now i can say that CEDC <thats his initials i hope u cud keep that secret incase na makilala u na xa>, is juz a gud friend.. i luv him.. no.. rather i loved him?? bkit my question marks? hindi ganun kabilis at hindi ganun kadaling piliting tanggalin o alisin ung nararamdaman mo sa isang tao.. ang sakin lang ksi.. pinagisipan ko mabuti kung anu nga ba.. kung mahal q b tlga xa.. baka nararamdaman q lang na ganun hindi pla..  andun ung confusions eh.. sa tingin q.. im loving him as a friend ngaun.. maybe becoz i realize na iyon tlga or what.. o bka im still in denial ksi ayaw q xa mahalin inspite of what my heart is tryin to tell me.. hindi q alam ksi naguguluhan din aq pro i juz know na he will always be special.. as special as ever.. cguro hindi man maging kasing kilig to the bones ang luvly ko.. khit na maraming beses qng buuin ang broken heart q.. i know samone is out there looking for me the way im looking for him.. wag lang sna xa matagalan.. bka mainip aq.. lalo p nung nalaman q how butz luv me.. kung gaano nya ipinagsigawan how much he luvs me.. eh hindi q parin narinig.. azar db?? nainip kasi aq kaya aun.. lalo p[ang lumala luvlyf q.. kla q magkakaisa na noon.. ang nangyari.. zero prin.. i juz hope na maging hapi ending luv story q.. i know i shud shed tears pro ayoq.. i dnt to be hurt by the one i love ksi lagi nalng ganun eh.. sawa na aq.. bka dumating nlng ung tym na matakot na tlga aqng magmahal.. at bka pagdumating ung tym na un eh saka pa q mahalin nun.. mas azar un.. kasi id be very willling to open my heart and willing to be hurt again.. 

ang gulo q noh..

hai

hay grabe the week that was!!! it was so tensefull as in nakakatense… i thot babagsak aq ng machines pro hindi pla.. grabe.. hai.. 

after that cnabi q na agad kay mami ever na ala aq bagsak and thats for her.. pwamis.. lahat ng ginagawa q for her tlga.. kasi she’s doing everything for us din eh.. d tulad nung isa.. eiw xa.. maging bitter ba?! 

kahit natalo aq sa pustahan na hindi aq nagsasalita ng isang araw aus lang.. ang sakin lang naman is to prove them na i can be quiet noh.. azar lang tlga ung ibang pipol na super judgemental.. aminado aq na i cant control myself not to speak.. wat can i do thats one of my otulet pra mailabas sama ng loob ko.. i dont want pipol see me crying.. kaya nga gladies eh prang gladiest.. from the rootword na glad meaning hapi.. i know naman na not all the time eh masaya ang buhay pro thats how i want my lyf.. kaya nga khit madame prob.. khit gusto q na umiyak.. im proud of myself kasi i still manage to smile.. i still manage to make my lecheng lyf.. a beautiful lyf by mking myself and ader pipol hapi.. kung natutuwa nga sila.. i maybe iritting samtime.. pro i know my limitations.. when to stop namn talking.. 

i am touch nga last time ksi i didnt expect n sa dinadami kong friends… i have few of them na nakakakilala skin.. and my heart was crush wen i found out na ung isang taong itinuturing qng friend eh iba ang pagkakakilala sin.. cguro ayoqng ipakita s lahat yung totoong aq ksi its for them to find out.. 

landi q noh?? ang tanong ganun ba tlga aq?

what’s the essense…

whats the essense of being inluv?? malay.. i still dnt know.. basta ang alam q.. its so hard knowing you love samone and pretending na frend lang turing mu habang secretly umaasa ka na he’ll wake up one morning realizing he’s inluv with you.. 

i juz know na if you rili luv samone you shud be hapi for him kahit alm you sa sarili mu na masakit for you.. martir effect ba..

yun tipong alam mu na masasaktan ka na pro hala go for the gold for him.. you’ll do anything.. any favor.. juz to see him hapi.. kahit labag sa kalooban mu.. gagawin mu yon ng buong puso.. kamartir ba?? 

hay.. sana crush nlang turing mu pwedeng pwede sabihin.. tulad nung ginawa ni andiano.. at mhy.. sabihin bang crush q c ian.. at cnabi pa mismo kay ian yun ha.. grabe.. super kinilig pa aq.. ipinakilala pa aq.. aus lang un kasi una.. dejins naman kami close nun.. tsaka crush lang tlga ksi lagi xa nakasmile.. unlike kay toot.. close na kmi.. dejins q pa tlga xa gusto..  talaga naman..

tiyak lolokohin nanaman aq ni sr hollman.. hehehe.. aus lang basta alam q malapit na nya malaman kung cno c toot pro d q parin sasabihin kung cno.. il juz wait na mahalata nya kung cno.. hehe basta sir kung mahalata nyo na.. ibulong nyo sakin ha.. ill tell you naman eh.. sa lahat ksi ng nakakaalam.. hinulaan nla.. and they never expected na xa un.. hehehe.. 

what’s the essense of this??? malay!

its summer time

yes its summer time… tapos na halos lahat ng exams.. thank God pasado naman.. isa nlng ang malaking tanong.. machines.. papasa kaya aq dun..kahit anung aral kasi ang gawin q.. ala tlga.. ilang puyat na ang ginawa q dun… ala tlga.. azar.. sana pumasa.. pero tulad last yir.. il be spending my summer sa skull.. ok lang mas madame na kmi ngaun.. sayang nga lang kasi dejins na q pupunta baguio tulad last yir.. la na gala.. aral mode na muna.. tsaka silay mode…

exicited na nga aq.. kasi.. grabe.. next skul yir fif yir na kme.. yehey.. khit d sure na gagraduate.. i know kung sama sama kami masusurpass namin yun.. hehehe.. that’s the essense.. of having friends.. hehehe..

re-collecting myself

last friday, nagkaron ng recollection sa school.. hindi tlga kami dapat ang magrere-collect pro masyadong buzy ung mga higher years kaya kmi ung nagrecollect.. inferness i enjoyed the seminar.. madaming bagay ang nag-flashback sakin… lahat ng ups and downs ko.. and i found out na im strong.. na khit iyakin ako.. kahit duwag aq.. i surpass all the trials God has given me.. sbi q nga the things that kept me fighting through all that is my family.. all my friends na tlga namang hindi aq iniwan.. inihahatid pa aq hanggang sakayan ng bus.. and the faith i have kay God na kahit kailan eh d aq pababayaan..

and that recollection makes me feel good about myself.. i realized na khit madami aqng problem.. i still manage to be hapi and to make samone hapi.. and thats my life… making samone hapi bcoz of me.. i never thot that sam of them are thankful meeting me.. well dapat lang im that unique tlga.. ala clang mkikitang pasaway na katulad q..